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Archive for November, 2009

Main Squeeze

I like to buy things for our little furry monsters. I can’t help it, really. They’re the only children we have! I’m quite certain if we ever have real ones, they’ll be spoiled rotten.

A few months ago, I bought some cheap new toys for the fur girls. They used to go through about one a week, but aren’t quite so destructive anymore. Thankfully they take a month or two to dismember most of their chewies these days. I have this bad habit of buying things and then leaving them in the shopping bags on the floor for days, until I get around to remembering to put them away. The new doggie toys were no exception. I shoved the bags into the office and forgot about them.

Around this time, I decided to test leaving the dogs out while I ran errands. Trixie is trustworthy. Molly… not so much. Despite our best efforts, she still likes to think of our office rug as her personal potty from time to time. But she had been doing well lately, so I figured it was worth a shot.

I must admit, I was a little nervous to walk in the door when I returned home. One of them alone is not bad, but the two of them together could probably tear the house apart, small though they are. I put my key in the door and heard:

*sniff, sniff, sniff… snort. Sniff, sniff, sniff… snort.*

That’s Molly. She tries to inhale the door whenever we come home.

I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the worst. Torn up toilet paper? Garbage strewn about? Urine soaked furniture? Shredded socks? What horrors of doggie life were awaiting me on the other side of that *sniff, sniff, sniff… snort*??

I slowly walked in. Hmm. Everything seems to be in order. No foul smells. Okay, perhaps Miss Snort behaved herself.

It wasn’t until I let them out to potty and watched her as she ran back inside that I found it. Evidence that Miss Molly didn’t quite resist all of her deeply entrenched canine urges. Oh no. She had been in the office and had found what was rightfully hers. I wouldn’t have ever known had she been smart enough to rid her face of the evidence.

squeeze-molly1

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I of course followed the sticker’s instructions. You can’t help but love this cute little monster.

Good golly, Miss Molly. You sure can make me laugh.

If it weren’t for my horse…

Favorite Lewis Black bit.

He’s usually got a dirty mouth on him, but this clip is clean.

Jokes.com
Lewis Black – College Horse
comedians.comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games
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